It's EVEN rarer for me to click on it to read it.
But somehow or another, I clicked on this read. And boy am I glad I did.
So its' an article about a guys being nice. The truth is, most guys who are nice here in Singapore, are either being friend-zoned (gosh I hate this word), or they are the kinda guys that expect something in return.
Like if I were to help you/give you something, people would expect me to get something in return, right?
But what If i tell you that sometimes, helping people or giving people something doesn't always means that I need to get something back. I know that's how most people think.
What if getting you to be happy is actually the best thing I can get, in return already?
Well, so this article is really interesting. I'm just gonna list down some of the stuff that really caught my eye.
"This proverbial Nice Guy the Internet speaks of — this often-alluded-to fallen hero men hide behind when cursing women for not dating them — needs to addressed. Because we’re throwing a big word around and many of us don’t know what it means.
What actually makes a nice guy… nice?
Many men have a very distorted view of The Nice Guy. They think he’s a guy who uses nice actions to sleep with women rather than playing the alpha male card. They think it’s the anti-alpha, the fallen hero.What these guys don’t realize is there’s one crucial detail they got wrong with their definition. Nice guys aren’t nice because they want to sleep with you, they’re nice because they aren’t just thinking about sleeping with you.
A guy isn’t nice because he says he’s nice. He doesn’t say he “tried to be nice and it didn’t work.” Because being nice isn’t a motive, it’s an attribute. Being nice isn’t a play or a disguise, it’s a genuine way of being that’s not contingent on its effect on women. Unfortunately, many men don’t understand this.
They think every personality, every stereotype, every way of being is about getting women. They think if women don’t sleep with them, it’s because their ploy didn’t work; they think that because they tried The Nice Guy on for size and it didn’t pan out, women don’t actually want the nice guy.
The real Nice Guys aren’t the ones who need to say it, they show it. The real guys don’t stop being nice because they aren’t getting ass. The Nice Guy is nice whether he’s sleeping with you or not.
Nice guys are nice because that’s just how they are. They display certain characteristics and qualities that differentiate them from run-of-the-mill assh*les.
So before you start putting down women by saying how nice you are, why don’t you take a look at the qualities nice guys actually possess and see if you fit any of them:
He wants to be your friend… and doesn’t complain about being friend-zoned.
The Nice Guy doesn’t whine and moan because you’re not treating him like the attractive alpha male he wants you to see him as.
He doesn’t throw a fit because you like him as a friend because he didn’t have any more motive. If hooking up happens, it happens. But he didn’t arrange for it that way.
He respects you… not because of what you can do for him.
A genuine, authentic nice guy respects a woman because she is his equal. He doesn’t respect her because she has tits or can provide certain services for him.
He respects them as people and not their capability to fulfill his desires.
He doesn’t give you everything… but also doesn’t expect anything.
Nice guys aren’t constantly trying to buy your affection because any woman knows that no man offers you gifts without expecting something in return.
Nothing comes free in this world, no matter how nice he’s pretending to be. An honest nice guy doesn’t buy you things because he isn’t expecting anything back."
So there are a couple more points but, yeah. you get the drift. If you're interested to read more, here's the link:
Enjoy.
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