Life entry

Being through quite a bit already in this 24 years+ of my life, I can't deny that there will always be a little fear and doubt of how the future will be like. Seeing how some people made it through all these years definitely helped me and encouraged me. But at the end of it all, when you're alone in the comfort of your home, there will still be wonderings and stuff like that. The only difference here that sets me apart from the world is that, some choose to just carry on wondering on, hoping that one day it will all work out for good. Some would prefer to escape from the truth and reality. Some would even just don't even bother about it anymore. Well, I guess what sets me apart from all that is the fact that I know WHO holds my future. And the One that's holding my future is also the one that's holding my hand in this journey. How precious is that.

Okay. I am just sitting in my room wondering about alot of things. Thus explains this entry. Hahaha. Not feeling emo whatsoever. Just thinking through this life of mine, and how amazing my Saviour Jesus Christ is. The past year had been a rather..... quirky one? Hah. I mean, God is good. Went to Hillsong Conference 2012, and that's a giant step for me man, since it's the first time I am actually going to a faraway land using MY OWN MONEY. I know. It has to be Jesus man. I am a student, and if I rmb correctly, my part time jobs in between semesters were just random odd jobs with not so high pay. But somehow, I made it over to the Aussie land and it was one heaven of a time. I am always grateful for that. :)

But also along the way, many things happened. Some happenings leaves me smiling like never before. Some are just horrible mistakes. HORRIBLE. I was wrong. Totally. It could have been avoided. But there I was, being the stubborn me, refusing to listen to some wise council. Thought somehow God would make it happen. But I guess with the theme of the year for our church is the "Key of David", God opens door and closes some too. I guess at that point of time, when it was so evident that the whole thing was just a mistake, when God sent people to tell me that this door is to be SHUT, I insisted that it remain open, and somehow pray that God would keep it open. What a mistake it was.

When God meant for a door to be shut, it better be shut. Hah. So a mistake made. Tears flowed. As always. Hahaha. But now as I'm typing this, I'm glad that it happen. Not so much that it was a mistake and I could have avoided all that, BUT for the fact that I really learn something in this. Like REALLY. 

Also, recently I found out some stuff that I guess... helped me in realizing and learning from it as well? Yeah. Honestly, I was devested upon hearing them news. I mean, I always thought otherwise. At least that's what people has been telling me, or rather, trying to get into my mind. But it wasn't quite like that. On the contrary, it was the complete opposite of what I had in my head. It kinda felt like... You know, all the "if only" moments. Then God spoke to me. Through a sermon, and via a man of God whom I have much respect for. 

God can redeem back ALL THE LOST TIME.

Yes He can. 

All those moments where I know I could have done better, can be redeemed back by the Grace of God. Relationships can be salvaged by the Grace of God. Studies can be accelerated by the Grace of God. Finance can be restored by the Grace of God. Everything! I am very encouraged and glad for that particular sermon. It was like... God specially tailor made that sermon just for ME. Hahaha. 

Well, all in all, 2012 has been good. But also, I made a mistake. Okay, I made mistakeS. I am wrong. So much so that some people are hurt. Some stuff are made known. But I am glad that because of these mistakes, I learn so much out of it. Just like Romans 828 has always been proclaiming, all things may not be good. But ALL things will SURELY work tgt for GOOD! 

Not that I will want to make the same mistakes again la. Duh. Hahaha. But this I say that by the Grace of God. A better person I will be this year and to the years ahead. A stronger person I will be this year and to the years ahead. A faithful one. A glorious one. A reliable one. This I am sure in Jesus name, Amen.